So I was just helping out one of my rather overworked friends write an essay for her course and the she told me that I had to come up with a humorous story that involved a very talkative person as the protagonist, well this is what I came up with, which to my surprise managed to fetch her some decent marks. :)
Whenever someone mentions a talkative person, the image that very easily comes to our mind is that of a very peevish person who tends to go on and on with his ramblings. A person who wouldn’t shut his ravings until you are forced to be outright rude and point it out that a little silence would be appreciated. Somehow when a person is described to be talkative, this is always what comes to mind.
Ralph on the other hand, was quite the exception to this stereo type. He was as talkative as it could get but au contraire to being pesky he was rather a delight. Standing at all but six feet high from the ground with that clean shaved face that had a jutting roman nose to it, Ralph was a charm that even other guys couldn’t resist chatting up with.
Ralph on the other hand, was quite the exception to this stereo type. He was as talkative as it could get but au contraire to being pesky he was rather a delight. Standing at all but six feet high from the ground with that clean shaved face that had a jutting roman nose to it, Ralph was a charm that even other guys couldn’t resist chatting up with.
He would jabber away till the end of the world, and if you added to that a pint of beer on the table, well God save you. But unlike any other talkative fellows Ralph always made conversation that made the other person smile, you sort of could never say no to him. And that smile, oh that smile, thrown in-between the long conversations with the precision of a surgeon ensured that Ralph became a ‘lex orandi’ in his own right.
Ralph was a lawyer by profession and I was a businessman but thanks to some fortunate coincidence I had the pleasure of being acquainted to him through a bunch of mutual friends. We both were pretty well established in our respective fields, even accomplished one might say. When we met however, we never discussed anything to do with our respective work fields. It was always something tangential, completely out of the blue.
It was early that Sunday morning when Ralph had asked me to meet him in Mays Diner for brunch. It wasn’t like him to go such downmarket diners, he was generally a person with rather cultivated tastes. The fact that he had called me to Mays meant that he didn’t want others to recognize him around the block and that the matter to be discussed was one that would be discreet and to be kept under the racks.
I went rather half-heartedly hoping that this entire affair would get over before the evening. It was uncanny of Ralph really but then again I had never been invited to a place like Mays by him ever before, it was usually more of a Leopold’s or La ’Gourmet.
Ralph waked in ten minutes after I had come and seated himself next to me. There was a very noticeable furtive manner about him. I just waited with a very blank expression, hoping he would be quick in his manner to spill the beans.
He asked for a steak which I found to be very surprising. It was an abomination for a man of such cultivated tastes like Ralph to not only come to Mays but have something like a steak from their menu. I stuck to having a golden buttered toast and a regular cup of tea. The food arrived within the next five minutes. A lot of harrowed looks were being passed by Ralph. After a long time I finally leaned over my plate and asked him what the matter was.
He didn’t seem to be quite himself, talking his way to glory. In a much unexpected jittery voice our dear Ralph whispered, “My old boy Johnny, I think I’m in love”.
I was rather amused to tell you the truth, at how our very outspoken Ralph had turned into this submissive mouse. He told me that her name was Jane, of their growing love and finally reached a point where he said that Jane and he had now decided to marry. I stood up jubilant and congratulated him, but he still seemed to have this morose expression across his face. He explained how Jane’s father was a certain Mr Ambrose and he needed my help. That was enough for me to change my jubilant smile to a look of pure shock and despair within seconds. See I was rather respected in my company and this Mr Ambrose he spoke of happened to be my boss. Ralph, the ingenious mind that he was, actually wanted me to talk to my boss for his daughters’ hand. The part that made this worse was that Mr Ambrose had developed this hatred towards lawyers, being cheated by one such advocate early in his life.
I was stuck to choose between the lesser of the two devils. Here there was my good chum with his puppy eyes expecting me to help him out with the love of his life and on the other hand I could hear the death knell of my professional career.
The following morning I finally administered to courage to go and talk to Mr Ambrose. As I opened the door of my cabin, just in the nick of time, the phone rang. Jane Ambrose had got to hear from Ralph of this ridiculous idea and had spoken to her father this morning itself before I got the chance to put my career at stake. Mr Ambrose had not agreed at first but don’t rich daughters know exactly how to use an arm-twist with their dear daddies.
All in all I was saved, by a narrow shave that too. I did attend Ralphs wedding, as the best man in fact. My smile hid the story behind why I was picked over Ralphs other buddies, for just the will was enough to get me picked as best man. The will to put my all on the line and take part in Ralphs Ludacris idea. Aah! Jane was an angel that Monday morning, indeed she was.
And as far as Ralph was concerned he was back to being his talkative self, eating from a plate of some of the finest caviar that was being served at his wedding. The shy and smitten little boy hiding somewhere behind that charming and outgoing man. Ralph was a lawyer by profession and I was a businessman but thanks to some fortunate coincidence I had the pleasure of being acquainted to him through a bunch of mutual friends. We both were pretty well established in our respective fields, even accomplished one might say. When we met however, we never discussed anything to do with our respective work fields. It was always something tangential, completely out of the blue.
It was early that Sunday morning when Ralph had asked me to meet him in Mays Diner for brunch. It wasn’t like him to go such downmarket diners, he was generally a person with rather cultivated tastes. The fact that he had called me to Mays meant that he didn’t want others to recognize him around the block and that the matter to be discussed was one that would be discreet and to be kept under the racks.
I went rather half-heartedly hoping that this entire affair would get over before the evening. It was uncanny of Ralph really but then again I had never been invited to a place like Mays by him ever before, it was usually more of a Leopold’s or La ’Gourmet.
Ralph waked in ten minutes after I had come and seated himself next to me. There was a very noticeable furtive manner about him. I just waited with a very blank expression, hoping he would be quick in his manner to spill the beans.
He asked for a steak which I found to be very surprising. It was an abomination for a man of such cultivated tastes like Ralph to not only come to Mays but have something like a steak from their menu. I stuck to having a golden buttered toast and a regular cup of tea. The food arrived within the next five minutes. A lot of harrowed looks were being passed by Ralph. After a long time I finally leaned over my plate and asked him what the matter was.
He didn’t seem to be quite himself, talking his way to glory. In a much unexpected jittery voice our dear Ralph whispered, “My old boy Johnny, I think I’m in love”.
I was rather amused to tell you the truth, at how our very outspoken Ralph had turned into this submissive mouse. He told me that her name was Jane, of their growing love and finally reached a point where he said that Jane and he had now decided to marry. I stood up jubilant and congratulated him, but he still seemed to have this morose expression across his face. He explained how Jane’s father was a certain Mr Ambrose and he needed my help. That was enough for me to change my jubilant smile to a look of pure shock and despair within seconds. See I was rather respected in my company and this Mr Ambrose he spoke of happened to be my boss. Ralph, the ingenious mind that he was, actually wanted me to talk to my boss for his daughters’ hand. The part that made this worse was that Mr Ambrose had developed this hatred towards lawyers, being cheated by one such advocate early in his life.
I was stuck to choose between the lesser of the two devils. Here there was my good chum with his puppy eyes expecting me to help him out with the love of his life and on the other hand I could hear the death knell of my professional career.
The following morning I finally administered to courage to go and talk to Mr Ambrose. As I opened the door of my cabin, just in the nick of time, the phone rang. Jane Ambrose had got to hear from Ralph of this ridiculous idea and had spoken to her father this morning itself before I got the chance to put my career at stake. Mr Ambrose had not agreed at first but don’t rich daughters know exactly how to use an arm-twist with their dear daddies.
All in all I was saved, by a narrow shave that too. I did attend Ralphs wedding, as the best man in fact. My smile hid the story behind why I was picked over Ralphs other buddies, for just the will was enough to get me picked as best man. The will to put my all on the line and take part in Ralphs Ludacris idea. Aah! Jane was an angel that Monday morning, indeed she was.
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